MY FIGHT - ME: 1 , CANCER: 0
When you’re getting ready for a fight, the first thing that comes to mind is a warrior who trains and does everything they can to defeat their enemy. The warrior is in great shape when the day of his fight comes. He even knows who he’s going to fight against, so he can prepare accordingly. Sadly, cancer is a hypocritical and fearsome opponent. He chooses your body without asking for your approval, makes you weak for years and when you finally learn about it, it has already made you draw upon your energy reserves. This is when the real fight starts. This is when your mental strength comes into play. The human body is incredible, because it can adapt and take hits. Its biggest limit is usually psychological. We can hopefully overcome this by being positive despite the blows we receive. This is obviously easier said than done, because you will be upset and sad. The most important thing is to always get back on your feet.
Learning that you have cancer is like being punched in the face. Your entire world crumbles overnight and you have to start over from scratch. Your health becomes your priority. In order to fight my cancer, I had to quit my job, drop out of school, leave the city in which I was currently living, and get out of my comfort zone. All of this happened in one week! At the end of March, I had my first surgery. This was a second big blow for me. Before starting chemotherapy and radiation therapy, I had my ovaries moved. I was happy at first, because it meant that I could still have children. I was crushed when I learned that this only meant that I wouldn’t go through menopause! My ovaries were safe, but radiation therapy could burn my uterus. I started my fight by accepting the fact that I may become sterile. This is something incredibly hard to do when you’re a young 24 year-old woman.
It doesn’t matter how old you are; radiotherapy machine are always impressive the first time you see them. You feel so vulnerable when you’re in them… I must admit that at first I was mad at the machine that would become my ally. I was upset because while it was helping me defeat my enemy, it was also hurting me. In time, I learned to know it better. I even enjoyed imagining it killing the "monster" inside me. The more radiation treatments I received, the more complications appeared. I was exhausted, constipated, incontinent, and I even had burns. I still remember the two weeks where I put ice between my legs and suffered from insomnia because of the pain. Let me tell you I had a whole lot of reasons to hate this machine. However, I still tried to stay positive, because I knew it was for my own good. I didn’t really have a choice, considering I had stage three cancer (stage four is the last stage, and is also called advanced cancer.) My cancer was too big, so I couldn’t undergo surgery right away to get it removed. I had to receive treatments to make it shrink before my surgery. During my radiation treatments, I also started chemotherapy. It was my third big blow. Chemotherapy makes you feel tired, sick and weak. You are not yourself anymore… but it’s for your own good. It wouldn’t be called a fight if it was easy, would it ?
Losing control over your own body is terrifying, but you can find positive things in every hardship. Relatives, family members, friends and partners are very important when going through an ordeal. Receiving their support was a blessing. You mustn’t retreat into yourself, even though it’s hard not to sometimes.
Don't forget that you can cry, deny it and be mad, but get back on your feet and keep fighting. Winners have a positive attitude! YOU can choose how you want to face hardships, even when you have no control over them.
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